Too Much Sheet Before Breakfast

Fletcher Murray - President of The Association
Too much sheet…   

Each morning my wife and I, upon arising, make our bed together. For some unexplained but persistent reason, there is always a lot more cover on my wife’s side of the bed than mine. Every morning, for decades now, I’ve been going through bed-making training.

Each morning we make the bed.  My wife, being a tidy homemaker wants to be sure that the length the sheet hangs down is exactly even on her side of the bed as on my side of the bed.  This is in case Martha Stewart drops by.

Maybe some of you go through this ritual in your life. I’m resigned to it.  Here’s the conversation each morning as we make our bed.

“I need more sheet,” she says.

“You want me to give you more sheet?” I say.

“Yes.  I want you to give me more sheet.”

“I thought I had already given you too much sheet.”

“No. I want some more sheet.”

That’s how it goes.  Recently, we had a big breakthrough. Here’s how it went:

“You gave me too much sheet, Honey,” I say.

“You want me to take some sheet back?”

“Yes. I want you to take back that sheet.”

She smiles triumphantly.

“You can’t take my sheet, can you.”

“No,” I answer.  “There’s only so much sheet I can take.”

The only time I don’t get sheet from my wife is when we stay in a hotel. The maid makes the bed.


If you want to get less sheet from your wife, take her on a trip.

(This story is rated by Flesch-Kincaid at 2nd Grade Level)

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